Top 10 Birds in the Department of Superior Birds

Once upon I time, I mused upon the departments I would create within the government should I somehow accidentally end up in charge. Today, I began to populate the Department of Superior Birds with what I’m going to impulsively call the Peeps of the House.


1. Penguins

They swim, they slide, they make art, they are empathetic!

2. Ducks



Need I say more?

3. Hummingbirds



The tiniest of all birds, they can hover, they can fly backwards, they would probably like cupcakes.

4. Burrowing Owls

Tiny, fluffy creature who nest underground. Because they can. I’m not sure how because they have wings and not shovels…but that’s what makes them Superior.

5. Condors

They’re pretty much modern dinosaurs (does that make them oxymorons?) They’re huge, and I want to fly around on one.

6. Kiwis

Say the word ‘kiwi’ and try to keep your heart from exploding with happiness. JUST TRY.

7. Ostriches

So many facial expressions. So many inaccurate historical rumours. Legends, I say!

8. Baby Pigeons



aka Squeakers. (Look it up!)

Their natural defense mechanism is being fucking disgusting.

9. Magpies



Ooooo. Shiny.

10. Gosling. Ryan.

Because I can.

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